“Dear Experts: When I have sex with my boyfriend I like it, but when it wants it again the next day or so, I don’t really care to give it to him. I’ve felt this way in other relationships also. Is something wrong with me?”
No, there is nothing wrong with you. It is common for a man’s sexual drive, especially that of a young man, to want to have sex more frequently than a woman does. A woman is simply wired differently in how her hormones work and, a lot of times, in what sex means to her.
What I care about more is this – maybe there are things you want to be involved with more than just having sex? When a young woman’s energy is focused a lot on a boyfriend, many things that are important to making a great life for the future get pushed aside. There are things that matter more to me about you than your boyfriend wanting to have sex a lot. Things like – 1) With sex, comes the chance of getting pregnant or becoming infected with a sexually transmitted disease (an STD). A baby is a forever life change and some STDs don’t ever go away – like herpes and HIV. 2) With sex, the energy you have for other areas of your life can get used up. Everyone has a dream for what they want to do, who they want to be. Finding your dream and making it happen takes time and effort. Is the risk of pregnancy and STDs worth what it can do to your dream? 3) With sex, you become emotionally tight with that person. Is he a person worthy of that bond? If he is, make sure he is showing you that in other ways – like having a dream for himself, working hard in school or at his job, and showing you commitment and respect. If he can’t do those things, it’s not worth having sex with him – any day.
Hope this helps.